The thing is, there’s a million different pasta shapes, and most of them are short. Yes, it will make pasta-passionate people sad, if you break spaghetti, because that makes them terrible at trapping sauce compared to the many other shapes.
But ultimately, it’s also a matter of: Why are you eating spaghetti-shaped pasta, if you don’t want it to be spaghetti-shaped?
Slowroll can alleviate that pain, if you’re fine with non-security updates being delayed by up to six weeks or so.