It’s a bit of a shot in the dark here, but have you considered looking into psychedelics? If you’re careful with them I’ve heard they can be life changing for treatment resistant depression and addiction. I only have experience with high thc cannabis (infrequently but at somewhat regular intervals, 1-4 times a month), but even that’s helped me (not in an assimilation into capitalism kind of way but in a feeling less burdened by the world kind of way, freer to pursue community, relationsips, etc, with less fear)
Even if you keep it in mind as a last resort, it might be something to consider.
Alternately/concurrently perhaps look into philosophy like that of Mark Fisher, bell hooks, or Lacan/Zizek for more perspectives from people trying to make sense of our current social reality.
It’s a bit of a shot in the dark here, but have you considered looking into psychedelics? If you’re careful with them I’ve heard they can be life changing for treatment resistant depression and addiction. I only have experience with high thc cannabis (infrequently but at somewhat regular intervals, 1-4 times a month), but even that’s helped me (not in an assimilation into capitalism kind of way but in a feeling less burdened by the world kind of way, freer to pursue community, relationsips, etc, with less fear)
Even if you keep it in mind as a last resort, it might be something to consider.
Alternately/concurrently perhaps look into philosophy like that of Mark Fisher, bell hooks, or Lacan/Zizek for more perspectives from people trying to make sense of our current social reality.