lilypad [she/her, undecided]

My morning has been, uh, difficultish. Im just exhausted and my roommate is being a bit odd.

excellent taste in both bread and the cute gal you keep in your phone

ive been glued to my phone way more than normal definitely nothing to do with the cutie inside of it, no no not at all

car ride

Im sorry your neck is busted! I know long long car rides well, and have few fond feelings for them. The worst was a 26 hour travel by bus and train. The train was nice, but of course it was the shortest leg of the journey. We also couldnt get any food or water cause it was in the middle of the first covid lockdown and all the kiosks were closed.

I hope youre in a non-mosquito-y part of sweden, its that time of year

i might be more online than previously feared!

Oh nooo! Youll just have to talk to the cutie in your phone then i guess, no way around it

doctor

Im just hoping to finally get a perscription and off of DIY. It would be helpful and less stressful.

you have a wonderful day and beautiful dreams if i dont manage to be online before you’re off to bed. talk to you later, sweetie.

Aww i hope you have a lovely time darlin ^^ and im sure my dreams will be wonderful ;)

Its making me choose already!?!? But i dont know them all that well! Cant I just not choose and be a useless poly lesbian or something? i just want to flirt with them all more and learn about them

I guess ill go with Nat? Shes the one im closest with… But also Morgan is fun from a flirty standpoint, but i know literally nothing about her. This feels like the VN equivalent of moving in with someone after dating/knowing them for a week; how can I know ill enjoy being Morgans partner (or anyones for that matter) if i dont know her :/

idk, either Morgan needs to shove me up against a wall or have some degree of conversation with me.

Idk, i feel like theres been a lot of cuts and scenes arent getting to play out in their entirety. LET ME TALK TO THEM DAMMIT! I can only fill in so many blanks that the story leaves me.

Not as far along as you, they just moved into my apartment

Good morning lovely! :3

give Reven a nice hug from me

Reven said and then gave me a big hug from you

My night was good, but I got poor quality sleep so im groggy and need to brew a big pot of coffee

baking

Rye might be my favorite bread. With the right toppings it just is divine i used to live by a bakery that made amazing rye loaves that were like bricks in their density but were so soft and were just the absolute best :3

Also snatching starter and flour from work is praxis

it exploded in the fridge

i cant imagine that was fun to clean up :(

ugh the worst part about this grass touching is that it’s going to cut into my cute gal on the phone time

^{i like being the cute gal in your phone :3}

Ive also got some grass touching ahead of me. Another birthday party, and hopefully a doctors appointment.

sweetheart

and you’re adorable so we fit together well

^{i like fitting well :3}

i made a whole post

Oooh im gonna have to write this down in my recipe book!

babka

Idk when were gonna make it, but ill def post pictures when we do! There arent any planned baking adventures on the horizon for me we dont exactly have the best kitchen for it, but my mother is going out of town soon so ill probably be able to go use her kitchen ^^ Ive been wanting to cook some sourdough but i dont have a starter anymore. I really like sourdough rye with dark rye flower, but the rye flour is so much more spendy :/

Im pretty tired, and am gonna go to sleep soon. Its late here ive got Reven (the fox) with me and im cuddling up for the night i just wanted to stay up to talk to the cute gal in my phone i hope you have a good day darlin <3 and that your family is relaxed and everything goes well :3

^heeee

Your so cute!

yeah, i’m out to them and they support the process, but it’s still kinda nerve wracking

Understandable most of my non-immediate family is like that. (Well, also my father).

soviet socialist method is faster

steam hardens the outer shell faster

Omg i never knew this! I always struggle with making my bread crisp!

~thank you for coming to my bread theory hour~ ^^

I am always in pursuit of delicious bread ^^

you’d think the yanks would get those right, but no smdh

Theyre good burger, just expeeeensive

it’s not really the same. dont get butterflies in those

^{me neither :3}

the grass is icky and gross, but have to emerge from my little nest sometimes. It’s for meeting some family who i havent seen in over a decade. kinda nervous tbh

Omg i hope it goes well! Can I ask, are you out to them?

baking

Oooh bread history

Ok now that I’ve bored you let’s get into it

Nonsense! I love this

bread recipe

That is a lot of waiting but good bread often is. Im used to letting things rise overnight tho ^^

baked in steam

Ooh ive never done this! What does it do to the loaf?

thats a lot of words, hopefully it reads well.

It reads perfectly

Good morning! :3

I did sleep well, thank you, due to no small part thanks to you ^^

Im glad

gosh dang i really enjoy these cutesy terms you use for me

your the one who started callin me sweetheart

Oh wow that’s rough. Sorry if this is prying but is that some sort of HSD? My partner has EDS and their body has similar problems with joint and connective tissues

Its just hypermobility to my knoweledge, but I havent been to a doctor for it in many many years, so who knows. Short version is that I can dislocate things real easy, and in general have shitty connective tissues holding joints in place.

Nope! Don’t use beeswax, it gets too hot and it can burn or blister.

Ty!

I don’t think I would get frustrated with someone for that

Im probably just being my overly-anxious self lol. Ive never tried to engage with this kink so lack of experience over here as well ^^

sounds like you like a lot about it so maybe it’s just coming up with your own version to work with

hmm maybe thats something to consider… Idk i dont even have a play partner right now (trust is hard )

If they can’t control me, then what business do they have domming me

That makes sense ^^ idk its not my thing but i love hearing about it and what makes it appealing, and i think that sentence made it make (more) sense ^^

Re act-in/-out:

yeah, act-in fantasies are fantasies i dont want to actually play out. I might fantasize about them, write about them, etc., but i dont actually want to engage in them, either due to safety concerns or what have you. I have a fantasy about uh nonconsentual stuff that is strictly act in because it would be unsafe and just not enjoyable if it was acted out. Im also just still grappling with that fantasy existing in my head, the shame around it, and all of that.

Act out fantasies on the other hand are fantasies I want to act out and engage in ^^

One that toes the line between these two is a Domme having me collared and at her feet and putting out her cigarette on me. I feel like it is interacting with my SH mental processes and so Im reluctant to engage with it, plus it would scar which is something I may want in the moment but need to also want outside of the moment. So for now its an act in fantasy.

I didnt know we had this emote and it is perfect for this conversation ^^

Re safety: i tend to err on the side of safety. My body is not stable and can get fucked up in a “oh we should go to the hospital” kind of a way a bit easier than most people, so i can get real paranoid about people binding near my joints, or whipping me near cartilidge or connective tissues. Its led to a difficult session or two where the flogger wasnt fully controlled. Thankfully no injuries occurred but still a good reminder of risk awareness for me.

Waxplay is one of the only kinks I’ve actually done, and I did parafin. I didn’t think it was too bad but this was also before I transitioned so my skin might be more sensitive now

Ooh maybe I could ask about this (no pressure to respond!)

Like, how was the parafin? I have a pretty high tolerance for burning, especially if its combined with other sensation, but i was thinking to start with soy cause of anxiety around biting off more than I can chew.

Also, can you just use any candle?

Yeah it’s fun! Thanks for sharing your own thoughts

Ofc!