I’d be Cables Don’t Tangle Man.
Food-doesnt-make-me-overweight-or-mess-up-my-health man.
So I can eat whatever I want and it’s perfectly healthy for me whatever it is. I’d eat ao much ice cream it wouldn’t be funny.
That’s a S tier super power.
I’ll take always being able to understand what people are saying, even if the voice is muffled or on a low quality recording or whatever. In conversations, I’d never have to ask people to repeat themselves.
(It doesn’t mean I could understand any language or code, just that I can correctly make out the words.)
I already have. Things break 10 times faster when I touch them.
What’s the opposite of procrastination?
Eagerness girl? That… sounds wrong somehow.All hail Productiva, Slayer of Tasks!
Fuck yes. I want that one!
When programming, I never make the same mistake twice.
Elevator is always waiting at the floor Im on. Man.
I would be Sleep-on-command man
That’s me. The secret is to give up caffeine entirely and stick to a sleep schedule even on weekends.
I have that one and it gets annoying some times.
It’s “on command”. Stop commanding yourself to sleep. 😁
Missed that detail. I’m just the sleep-anywhere-anytime-as-long-as-I-am-not-moving, then.
I don’t know if this qualifies as “b-tier”, but I’d really would like a superpower where when hearing a sound I knew exactly what made it.
I live in an old house, in the middle of a forest. Lots of weird noises both inside and outside. Being able to know if a sound I just heard requires my attention (i.e. “is that some animal messing around in my walls, or just the old wood squeaking”) would be gold. The amount of times I’ve gotten out of bed in the middle of the night to investigate something is too damn high. After countless mice, vasps nests, birds, and various mammals deciding to move in with us, my paranoia levels have skyrocketed.
Would also sort out the “is that my kid crying, or just the draft through the vents”-question, as well as “is that normal wood settling noises, or is there more rot I’ve yet to find and the whole house is collapsing”.
I’m happy I’m not alone. Last night something was going through my kitchen. It sounded larger than a mouse and it didn’t care about making noise. You know that moment when you’re asleep and your body wakes you up slightly cuz something is off. And you’re in that low power state thinking about whether you should think or not because it’ll wake you up?
Anyway I was so exhausted I thought let it have some fun I just can’t care.
There are dozens of us!
I’ve had the exact same reaction - “whatever it is, as long as it stays out of the bedroom I’ll deal with it tomorrow”.
My favorite incident here, as a tangent, is when my wife came to me for help while I was doing something in the garden. A large crow was sitting on the kitchen counter. My initial thought was “well there goes my day” as birds tend to be the worst to get out. However, everyone keep saying how smart those birds are so I figured I’d do what I do when half-ferral cats stumble in.
So I walked in, see the crow, the crow sees me, and we kind of just stare at each other. I slowly backed up, went around the house and entered again through the backdoor. I grabbed his attention again before going out once more, and in again through the main door. We stared at each other some more, and then he just lightly jumped across the floor and went out the back door. No frantical flying and crapping everywhere. 10/10 experience as far as birds stuck in the house goes.
It’s probably in my imagination, but we shared a moment there. What’s not in my imagination though is that afterwards a bunch of crows started hanging around the house. So I started giving them some snacks every once in a while, because why not. Long story long, we have a small murder of crows watching over the property.
The crow whisperer.
A while back my shed suddenly was demolished spontaneously. So I’m running around in full makeup trying to get all the gardening stuff out to put it in my place.
There were some shockingly large spiders there. I’m talking the largest that I’ve ever seen irl outside a zoo.
Doesn’t matter, eggs and all are going inside.
So the other day I woke up and I saw one of those babies right above my head on the wall. I’m like I better get rid of this thing before I give it a name. Scurries off under my bed.
I imagine it’s still there but I’ve made my peace with it.
And as for mice. Honestly I’d build them a little home and give them little sandwiches. In fact I have made little sandwiches for them. The issue is just that they make my kitchen dirty.
This sounds like a good premise for a horror story. You get your hearing superpower and everything is finally great, no need to get up and investigate benign noises. And then one day, you hear a sound that no matter what you do, you can’t tell what and where it’s coming from.
I’d be infinite stamina man. never get out of breath again, even while jogging
I’d be perfect departure time man. Able to determine exactly when to leave in order to arrive at your destination on time, regardless of traffic, weather, or other conditions encountered along the way.
So you want to be German?
You’re not from Germany are you? Our train system is horribly bad after it was left to rot for decades (no bigger investment into renewing or expanding stuff)
I actually seem to have this one: Appropriately sized container man. I can find the best sized container when we have leftovers from cooking. Extra pasta sauce? This container fits it all in perfectly.
IDK man, that’s toeing the line of an A-tier power.
My wife has a version of this; it’s perfect liquid measurement estimation woman. She never has to use measuring cups for liquids. I’ve actually bothered to test this power, and it’s uncanny.
All I got was hysterical kitchen blindness man. I can’t see things I’m looking for in the fridge or pantry, even when they’re right in front of me.
Sorry man, yours isn’t even a power. It comes default with the Y chromosome. I can be staring directly at something I’m looking for and not register that it’s right there.
Me: Owns a variety of sizes of containers
Also me: Only uses 2 of the sizes, and never has a clean one when I need it
I just wanna be No-health-problem man
I’d love to be no-longer-forced-to-rent man.
Never get bitten by mosquitoes man.
Well… ok, but it doesn’t work for horse flies or black flies.
Mosquitos used to find me attractive, but as I aged they didn’t come by no more.
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I alread have my super power and love it: high definition vision in low light conditions.
Bright lights hurt my eyes and I only get my supervision in b&w but it is really useful.
