The biggest issue I’ve seen with plant-based burgers is that these moronic restaurants cook them on the same grill/part of the grill as their beef. My wife loves Beyond Meat, but every time she’s ever asked, they cook that shit right where the greasy beef was cooked moments before. Of course the vegetarians don’t fucking want it.

Joe Erlinger, president of McDonald’s USA, was speaking at the Wall Street Journal‘s Global Food Forum in Chicago earlier this week. When asked if the burger would be returning to US menus, he replied: “We actually tested the McPlant, and I asked the team to test the McPlant in two very different markets. And so they chose San Francisco and Dallas, and I said: ‘Perfect.’”

He went on to say that the product was “not successful” in either markets. “I don’t think the US consumer is coming to McDonald’s looking for the McPlant or other plant-based proteins,” he added.

Joe Erljnger sounds like an utter moron.

San Francisco and Dallas are probably the absolute worst places to attempt to sell a plant-based burger at McDonald’s, for opposite reasons. You need to test it in markets where there are not any built-in feelings about meat and/or meat alternatives.

You don’t need a McPlant in San Francisco, and you don’t buy a McPlant in Dallas. Both have strong restaurant markets with heavy competition. If you’re at a McDonald’s in San Francisco or Dallas, it’s because you’re desperate for cheap food and you hate yourself.

They should have tested it in places like Milwaukee, Atlanta, or Albany.

I hope every McDonald’s burns to the ground and all the executives go to prison for animal abuse, labor exploitation and promoting obesity.